Feelings are a language way bigger than words. By "feelings" I mean emotions & sensations. They are condensed information packages like zip files. For me they contain not just personal content but also something of everything I care about, which God knows, is a lot! I am learning more about what it means to be a "feeler" for the Kingdom of God. I pray dear Lord for your burden that is light to help me do your will in discerning & deciphering important feelings & what to do with them, amen! It is interesting listening to stories of how people come to hear the Lord's calling & how He enriches lives & brings people through challenges. Listening to others' testimonies has helped me, as a Christian, feel less alone in what I have been through. Christianity is often not glamorous or easy. Many of us either come from or get into such difficulties at some point that we even question wanting to be immortal! Despite this, there are millions of brilliant Christian testimonies & many martyrs. This says a lot about the power of the living God! I agree with J. Warner Wallace, the American homicide detective & Christian apologist, who says: "I am not a Christian because it works for me, I am a Christian because it is true." As Christians, we give up to God our temporary, carnal (worldly) lives for eternal life with Christ: Whoever finds their life will lose it, and whoever loses their life for my sake will find it. Matthew 10:39 (NIV) I have been feeling called to share my testimony for quite some time & have realized I need to break it down into short stories so as to capture adequate detail. This blog is about the time in my life, not long ago that culminated in re-dedicating my life to the Lord. After many years of me/cfs illness & trying numerous things to improve my health without success, including crying out to God in prayer countless times, in 2020 I sought energy healing. I won't go into details about how those specific sessions were for me but I'll mention a few points about taking an online class taught by the energy healer. ![]() This course was for learning metaphysical strategies to improve my energy, in other words, "new age" practices. There are those who believe that some of the origins of new age teachings come from Christianity, but with the authority of Jesus Christ removed, they are dangerous, blasphemous, idolatry. At that time, I was a Christian but on the periphery of new age for years, however, I was never really sold on it. Participating in the class with the energy healer felt intriguing but also intimidating. I had entered an arena that felt foreign to me. I was like a pet rabbit in a jungle! They were checking me out in a deep & undisclosed way, which was not comfortable for my highly sensitive, introverted self who just wants to be healthy, engage harmoniously with others & have a pleasant life. Also, I could feel more clearly than usual how everyone's morality is unique. It is good that I came to know these things in such a tangible way because before this, I could be naive & too trusting of others. However, being introverted & reserved has been one form of protection against that. Around this time, I realized how important adhering to the ten commandments is for communities. As common sense as they are to me, many other people live by totally different moral laws or none at all. In the late Spring of 2020, the energy healer-teacher invited me to a 'purification' or sweat lodge, that he was leading. There was four other participants, one 'watchman' & I brought a friend along. It is impossible to put such a densely packed felt experience into words but I will do my best. May this message be pleasing to the Lord & helpful for the Kingdom of God. Before beginning 'the sweat', I was concerned the heat inside the lodge was going to be unbearable, like the heat inside a car on a hot day, a suffocating heat, but it was not like that at all. The most striking aspect of the experience was the profound, unspeakable beauty. ![]() Beauty I felt. Beauty that drenched me in a tender, misty-liquid-light type of love that emanated from the fire that was inside the rocks that lay burning in the middle of the lodge. Holy Spirit filled the dome-shaped log structure we were gathered in. There was nothing scary about this experience, yet I also felt vulnerable & an appropriate 'fear of the Lord' in there. His shear power, sacredness & deserving of respect, commanded such reverence. If there were any unholy spirits around, they didn't stay long! The blissful, comforting, healing warmth of Holy Spirit relaxed my body that so often feels pain. Plus, there was just the right amount of coolness in the air coming up from the earth that we were seated upon. My mind felt peacefully calm & clear as I breathed in the delicately rich scent of cedar. We each prayed & also sang Amazing Grace together. "Tri-Infinity Eagle Lodge" - this is the art I made after participating in the June 202o purification lodge. Those embryo-like looking things in the middle are the 6 souls in the lodge as the black grandfather rocks burned, glowing orange at the center in between us. The misty-liquid-light of the Holy Spirit fills the air & Eagle Watchman stands nearby with open wings of protection, amen & praise the Lord! This event was a mixture of Indigenous culture, Christianity & new age healing. What the ... (insert 'mind blown' emoji)? I would have liked to of had more prior understanding about the tradition of the purification lodge & 1:1 debriefing time with the energy healer. I was told later by one of the elders that the purification lodge is similar to going to church for Indigenous people. Well it was quite the service, phew! I am grateful I was able to feel the healing, power & beauty of the Holy Spirit during that experience. However, I will also add that there are things that happened during that chapter of my life that were unbearably painful & difficult to process on my own. It has taken me years to integrate & just now share little bits of it. I have not felt comfortable talking with anyone about these experiences in any depth & this isolation has weighed on me. I participated in the lodge when I was going through a time of extremely poor health as well as the pandemic. I would not have gone for energy healing if I had other options & wasn't at the end of my rope. I am curious about the other participants' experiences in the lodge; likely they are quite different from mine. This was not the first time I had been overwhelmed by the presence of the Holy Spirit. While it was blissful for me at this time, I know that the convicting power of Holy Spirit can also be very uncomfortable - even to the point of being confused as an evil presence. Scripture records several examples of the spirit of the Lord, immediately upon appearing to people, saying: "Do not be afraid" (Isaiah 41:10; Matthew 1:20; Luke 2:10; Acts 18:9). "Wings of Wisdom" - I drew this eagle just after attending the purification lodge based upon the experience of what I felt. Psychology & new age spirituality teach about the importance of "shadow work" & integration for healing & personal development. Integrating the shadow is about seeing & accepting the "dark side" or hidden aspects of ourselves rather than remaining unaware or repressing them (often with guilt & shame). The energy healer told me that trying to heal by doing shadow work on ourselves is like trying to do our own dental work, ouch! Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I fear no evil, for You are with me; Your rod & Your staff, they comfort me. Psalm 23:4 (NASB) The concept of "shadow work" comes from scripture. A central part of Christianity is being well-aware of the dark or evil, sin-nature of ourselves & of humanity in general. We also understand there are dark forces at work in this world. We are not affirming of evil, rather, we acknowledge that it is our biggest problem & it is precisely why believing in what Jesus has done for us is top priority & necessary for our salvific purification. Jesus is who He says He is & thus we need Him for ourselves to become whole & fully healed. And the very God of peace sanctify you wholly; and I pray God your whole spirit and soul and body be preserved blameless unto the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ. Jesus takes each of us as we are - broken by our own & others' sin & He mends us up with His righteousness so that we can stand before the holiness of God & survive His consuming fire (see Deuteronomy 4:24 & Hebrews 12:29). Furthermore, we are not to perform 'dental work' on our own teeth or trust just anyone with our shadow work - Holy Spirit takes care of this through conviction, baptism by fire & sanctification. In this world, we face evil that is in the open light of day & that which is hidden in the darkness of night. There is good & evil intertwined in everything except God who is all good (see Mark 10:18). For example, how is it not more widely considered evil that much of the money being invested & exchanged world-wide involves sin (e.g. exploitation, greed, over-consumption, gluttony, corruption, dishonoring God's resources & creation etc...)? As Christians, how can we improve upon an economic system that has sin built into it? How is the economy changing as God's Kingdom comes & His will is being done on earth as it is in heaven? While I was in the new age online class, even though I felt like a defenseless rabbit in a jungle, that was not the truth. In fact, I was & am a lion (or lioness) because of who lives in me. In surrendering my sin & weaknesses to Christ, I am made strong through Him. It is still not easy being a feeler though! I adapt with a slow pace of life because feelings are heavy & can be deceiving & they take time to process. I am learning to not go to either extreme of over-focusing on details & feeling too much of one specific thing or zooming out in a huge way & feeling diffuse exhaustion. We all need God's help to see & understand more, like how both evil (the weeds) & good (the wheat) are to "grow together" until such time: Let both grow together until the harvest. At that time I will tell the harvesters: First collect the weeds and tie them in bundles to be burned; then gather the wheat and bring it into my barn. Matthew 13:30 (NIV) A few years after the purification lodge ceremony, I heard from the energy healer that as a child, he accepted Christ as his personal Lord & savior but sometime later, he got into metaphysical studies to make sense of his psychic abilities. I believe those abilities are spiritual gifts from the Lord but he was told they are sinful which had him turn to other ways of getting help. As Christians, we need to be there for each in support of developing our spiritual gifts rather than fearing & shunning them. I believe God allows Christians to go 'undercover' as sort of a type of 'missionary' into new age or other communities. All missionary work is risky but this type is especially so because, as I say it tends to be 'undercover' in that to some degree we might even have to forget certain aspects of who we are in Christ or who Christ is in order to reach people & learn about Him in new ways. It might take someone who can feel Christ to be a reminder that He is within & wants us back exclusively now! By God's grace, we do turn back & can then share our stories of warning & walking each other home to Christ. Other than the main concern of idolatry, the caution I offer is that the new age can be like any other business & the people who come to it seeking help are often in an especially vulnerable place. It is a way of selling things that make people want & even need more of whatever is being sold. This is how most businesses work in our economy - selling salt water to people dying of thirst. Some people feel this is also how religion & church are but this has not been my experience. The first & most important commandment of Christianity is to love God with all our heart, soul & mind, which, thank God, doesn't have to cost any money. When we love God this way, He is our Shepherd & fills us up with 'living water' which makes us less needy of the endless array of empty promises being sold in the world. There are numerous Bible verses that tell us we are all called to Christ, for example: "...at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, and every tongue acknowledge that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father. Philippians 2:10-11 (NIV) & yet, I have come to see that there so are many unique paths to Christ. Furthermore, I have come to appreciate that the new age is a way for people who don't accept Christianity to understand more about the darkness of this world so as to try to wield it rather than be wielded by it. Sadly, many new-agers get hurt & further from Christ but there are also those who find the truth, the way & the life in Jesus Christ through the new age. I pray that all those in the new age come to know & submit to Christ sooner rather than later so that the least harm is done, amen! When I was drowning in health problems, just praying, even sincerely lamenting on my own, was not enough. To stay afloat while treading water in a storm, I needed practical, tangible help. I needed (& still need) my family very close by, which meant I had to admit where I was at (gulp) & ask them to swoop in & help me & they do so much! I need church on an on-going basis. I need frequent worship & prayer with other believers. The Holy Spirit & word of God continue doing sacred & expertly careful work transforming & assisting me to do the things I have mentioned that are out of my character, as well as sharing this testimony! Praise be to God, amen.
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I created this image to express how I often feel living with ME/CFS. The magnificent thing about our "boats" (ourselves) is that, far more than actual boats do, we have a huge effect on the world around us! Our presence - bringing GOD into the world around us, changes the world. Lord, your kingdom come, your will be done, on earth as it is in heaven, thank you & amen. Dear Holy Father,
We come humbly before you, each of us carrying some degree of weariness & burden. Our natural inclination is to fight & try harder, tiring ourselves out even more. Your word says you give us rest. Please teach us Lord, how to receive the peace, comfort & healing of resting in you. I invite us now to first just take notice & ask: is there a way I can position myself so that I am a little bit more comfortable? Maybe just a slight shift of my hip, or lean back or forward or can I choose to let go of holding certain muscles tightly? ... Ahhh, that is a little better already! And now, let us appreciate the blessing of the Lord’s ever-present breath in our lungs! Living with chronic pain, can make it difficult to appreciate our bodies, especially the parts that really hurt. It seems as if our body is letting us down or has even turned against us. Lord, you teach us in 1 Corinthians 6:19 that our body is the temple of the Holy Spirit you have given us. Our body is not a tool or our slave. Please help us take time each day, especially on the worst feeling days, to rest easy in appreciation of & through your love & strength. Let’s start with our feet. Please bring your attention to your feet. Are they feeling cold or warm? Tense or relaxed? Can you feel your toes? Can you feel the bones in your feet? When we pay attention like this to our bodies, it is like standing at the doorway to the temple of the Holy Spirit within! Thank you feet; you do so much for me! Now, imagine Jesus near you. How does He look? Where is He in relation to you? If you feel pain in your feet or at a different place of your body, show this to Jesus & see what he does or says. Moving on now to our legs. Give your attention to the bones & muscles around your knees ... & your hips. Can you shift your focus to the skin on your legs & notice a difference? Are there areas of your legs that feel good, maybe soft or tingly or even just ok? We will move on now to our back, neck & shoulders. These areas often feel sore from tension, stress & injuries. Let’s take a moment to notice whatever we notice here. Gently move your head from side to side, if you wish. Thank you God for my spine & all the muscles doing the best they can to keep me mobile & functional. Now, imagine yourself in a large, comfortable chair cuddled up with Jesus right next to you. Whatever part of your body that troubles you most, including any part I have not mentioned yet, bring it to Jesus & see what He says or does. How does it feel if Jesus touches or holds this part of you? We are coming to the end of this guided relaxation journey. Please take a few moments to wiggle your toes & fingers. As you notice your chest & belly moving with your breath, thank Jesus for His presence & tell Him you will see Him again soon! When you are ready to open your eyes, please do so & if you wish, take a moment to write down one or two words, insights or prayers you’ve had. If you’d like to share about your experience, please do so in the comments. Thank you for your participation. This unanswered question posed by God in Jonah 4:11 is the final verse in this unique story of such rich & great depth. The book of Johan in the Bible is about a prophet who attempts to avoid God's command to warn the Nenevites that their evil ways have caught up with them. Rather than going into enemy territory to sound the alarm, Jonah takes an unsuccessful sabbatical from God's service. He gets tossed overboard a ship into the stormy sea & then is miraculously 'rescued' from drowning by being swallowed by a sea creature. Jonah spends three days inside the belly of the beast! For the whole of chapter two, Jonah prays sincerely; crying out to God from 'the depth of Sheol' (NASB) or 'from deep in the realm of the dead' (NIV). Jonah describes rock bottom viscerally & quite relatably to those who've been there. He also expresses his awakening - a changed heart & renewed vow: But I will sacrifice to Thee Even though Jonah doesn't repent for trying to ditch God's instruction, God makes the great fish vomit him back to life upon dry land for another chance. This seems symbolic of baptism & being born again. I guess God knew that Jonah's willingness to obey this time around was in fact the best any Hebrew of that day could do for the wicked & terrorizing people of Neneveh. Renewing his vow to the Lord strengthens Jonah to deliver the most successful prophesy of the old testament - everyone in Neneveh (even the animals) take him seriously & call on God in repentance. Jonah's anger (to the point of wanting to die) over God's relent, clearly shows Jonah's human nature. In contrast, eight hundred or so years later, Jesus, the son of God (God in human form), refers to the 'sign of Jonah' as an astute illustration that 'now something greater than Jonah is here'! Praise the Lord for all those who hear & believe :) Matthew 12:38 Then some of the Pharisees and teachers of the law said to him, “Teacher, we want to see a sign from you.”39 He answered, “A wicked and adulterous generation asks for a sign! But none will be given it except the sign of the prophet Jonah. 40 For as Jonah was three days and three nights in the belly of a huge fish, so the Son of Man will be three days and three nights in the heart of the earth. 41 The men of Nineveh will stand up at the judgment with this generation and condemn it; for they repented at the preaching of Jonah, and now something greater than Jonah is here. For what was asked of him, Jonah's anger is understandable but so quickly he forgot that God's compassion upon the Nenevites doesn't mean everything will be sunshine & roses for them. Just as Jonah had to endure his own 'day of the Lord' in the belly of a fish & he still wasn't 'off the hook' regarding God's plan, so it is for everyone: "Do not be deceived: God cannot be mocked. A man reaps what he sows." Galatians 6:7 It's just as Tim Mackie says: "God is not out to destroy us. He's out to show us that we're going the wrong way so that we can turn & find grace & new life. God's judgment is a good thing; it's an expression of His love. It's aimed at restoring people to relationship with Himself." God's judgment brings justice but it certainly & often doesn't seem fair or right or fun for us. Could it be that 'justice is as justice does' but is not as it appears? We learn from the book of Job that when it doesn't look as though justice is being served, we are to trust God anyway; He is working everything out 'just so' in His infinite wisdom & ways. When we consider all the moving parts, it's no wonder things are as they are. Jonah's well-heeded proclamation to the Nenevites was a hint toward the blessing of Jesus to come to all nations, including to those who are not God's chosen Jewish, Israelites. As I mentioned in my previous blog, Christian salvation is unique in that it is not about what we do as much as it's about what God has done for us. Christianity & going to heaven do not come about by 'being a good person' as many seem to think. We can not 'good' our way back to God as we were before 'the fall' because sin keeps us 'spiritually dead' to our Creator. Being or doing good doesn't cover up, cleanse or remove our sin. Only Jesus' death on the cross accomplished this & before Christ, people such as the Nenevites were saved by their faith in God & made righteous unto Him through repentance. No one is without wrongdoing except for Christ. Thank you God for giving us 'that which is greater than Jonah'. For it is through Jesus that we are reconciled to: "Our Father in heaven, This is a photo I took in my community of the beautiful, July full moon. Before being called by God to prophesy, Amos was a herdsmen & farmer. He became like the light of this full moon, shining God's warning & wisdom upon his neighbors who were caught up in corruption & spiritual darkness. There are numerous examples through out the old testament showing us what Acts 10:34 tells us: among the wayward & unrepentant, God doesn't show favoritism. His Holiness brings justice upon everyone. His 'chosen' people, Israel, are certainly no exception. Yet, He is patient & gives lots of chances for people to make changes by seeking & returning to Him. It is our choice to heed His messages (scripture) or to not. Whom of those who've read, can honestly deny His ROAR!? Therefore, thus I will do to you, O Israel; Because I shall do this to you, Prepare to meet your God, O Israel. Amos 4:12 God's instruction to His people is not convoluted. It seems to me as straightforward as looking both ways before crossing the street ... so that we may live. For thus says the Lord to the house of Israel, "Seek Me that you may live." Amos 5:4 But even with this simple instruction, I sometimes wonder, what hope do we have here? Given that long ago, while in union with God in the Garden of Eden, we turned away from having all our needs met, unto sin! From this act of rebellion, we fell into conflict & layers of impossibility; obstacles within obstacles. Such is the day of the Lord: Alas, you who are longing for the day of the Lord, for what purpose will the day of the Lord be to you? It will be darkness and not light; As when a man flees from a lion, and a bear meets him, or goes home, leans his hand against the wall, and a snake bites him. Amos 5:18-19 The hardships of life on earth surrounded by spiritual death can lead us back to the Lord if we open ourselves to this possibility. The hope we have comes from following Jesus, who takes all judgement of others out of us because everyone is equally in need of His salvation. I pray for God's justice to keep working its way through each of us unto others & this land, amen. But let justice roll down like waters and righteousness like an ever-flowing stream. Amos 5:24 Justice comes through sharing God's word, which I like to do, hopefully so, in ways that inspire curiosity & awe ('The Spirit') rather than repulsion. As we know from 1 Cor. 2:14 "The person without the Spirit does not accept the things that come from the Spirit of God but considers them foolishness..." Thank you God for ending my famine for hearing your words. I praise you for filling, healing & strengthening me with the Holy Scripture. I do not take for granted that the Bible is freely available to me. I pray that all who are in need, waiting & searching, many who know not for what they seek, will find you dear Lord Jesus, hearing & heeding your word, amen. "Behold days are coming," declares the Lord God, "When I will send a famine on the land, not a famine for bread or a thirst for water, but rather for hearing the words of the Lord. Amos 8:11 I've been thinking about parents who encourage their toddlers & young children to "help" with the daily chores of sweeping, cooking, laundry, yard work & such. Doing so is not because the little ones are actually helpful in these ways, rather it is preparation & for their healthy development that parents take extra time & effort doing this. And so it is with God, who allows & equips us to "help" Him do His will: Romans 12:2 Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is--his good, pleasing and perfect will. As children are in comparison to adults, we are even greater still so much more vastly 'clumsy' & insufficient compared to God! Even with the best of intentions, we get in the way of His perfect will. Probably messing things up far more than actually helping! Might it be that this perspective can take some needed pressure off the "being good" part of what it means to be the Lord's disciples? He takes us on! Continuing to equip & develop us despite our many failures. Even when we 'do things right' as in the case with Daniel, this may mean exposure to blazing fires & lions' dens for us to get the Lord's message & show it to others. Despite potentially negative consequences, Daniel 'tested & approved what God's will is' by sharing his interpretation of the "writing on the wall" to king Belshazzar: Daniel 5:23 "...you have praised the gods of silver and gold, of bronze, iron, wood and stone, which do not see, hear or understand. But the God in whose hand are your life-breath and your ways, you have not glorified." Imagine being trapped with hungry lions for worshiping God, as Daniel did, despite king Darius's injunction not to. Daniel didn't have to kill these lions. God demonstrated His power in a more delicate way by sending His angel to shut the lions' mouths in light of Daniel's innocence. Daniel's courage & survival inspired the king to make the following declaration: Daniel 6:26-27 I make a decree that in all the dominion of my kingdom men are to fear and tremble before the God of Daniel; For He is the living God and enduring forever, And his kingdom is one which will not be destroyed, And His dominion will be forever. He delivers and rescues and performs signs and wonders In heaven and on earth, Who has also delivered Daniel from the power of the lions. God made us to dwell in perfect presence with Him in the Garden of Eden. Of course He prefers when we listen to Him & do not sin but He knows we are all learning to 'test & approve what God's will is' & in doing so we make many mistakes. Some of us wrestle with the thought: "If only I were in the perfection of Eden like Adam & Eve lived, it would be easier to not to sin." Yet, here on earth, in our fallen state, God provides us with an 'out' that reconnects us with the perfection of the "Garden of Eden" --this is Jesus & the Holy word of God, the Bible. Yet still there are so many who choose not to acknowledge & receive these gifts as such; as His word & the way, the truth & the life. I pray that we receive these gifts over & over as many times as is needed to live 'his good, pleasing & perfect will.' Amen.
I appreciate James Finley's talk on YouTube called: Becoming a Healing Presence in a Traumatized World. He shares stories about his childhood of violent abuse from his alcoholic father & how God sustained him throughout all that. Upon his graduation from high school, he entered a monastery which he says "radicalized me". With poetic imagery, he describes a few 'otherworldly' Godly experiences he had there. But then he undergoes another encounter of abuse, this time from a well-respected priest in authority over him & he "had a breakdown'. Finley explains the breakdown by saying: "As I was walking around, I felt like I was unraveling & sanity was like thin ice over icy-cold black water & it was cracking & if I fell through, because of my trauma history, I might never find my way back again, so I left." He left the monastery without telling anyone what happened.
While I have not experienced the same severity of abuse, I've had enough trauma (& the privilege of being removed from it) to viscerally relate with Finley's description of "breakdown" & his response of fleeing. After painstakingly climbing my way out of a clinical depression in my twenties on my own via 'self-help', I did some traveling & then began a two-year apprenticeship at a personal growth institute in Massachusetts. For a brief while in life, I was at the top of my game! So I thought. What I didn't understand during my time at this institute is that the teachers there, so they could help me heal more, wanted me to 'repel' back into the hole of pain I scraped my fingernails off climbing out of. There was no way in hell I would willingly go to that place again. I eagerly explored many 'unhappy' beliefs & motivations for doing this & feeling that but simply put, I didn't feel nearly enough love from or trust in the teachers there, for me to 'climb back down' into the pit of despair to bring forth whatever remained. I'm doing so well now, I subconsciously thought, I've recovered from the wounds that had caused depression. Why pick the scabs & make them bleed again? This intensely demanding work & emotional 'healing' place I lived at for two years is why my 'Mama Bear' protector part re-activated. Instead of being angry & aggressive toward others, she protected me with shut-down (hibernation). Wait it out, in time things will be better (hopefully they will eventually stop prodding me with a hot iron). This is a major survival strategy for many living things that must endure difficult conditions over long periods. Shut-down mode plays a role in triggering & maintaining the long-term illness (ME/CFS) I experience but is not the whole story. What I know now, all these years later, is that Self is insufficient for healing. Even Self + doctors, medicine, friends, family, spiritual & psychological help, exercise, fresh air, sunshine, good nutrition, plenty of rest & sleep - all of that is beneficial, don't get me wrong, but barely touches the surface of the hellscape of on-going, daily body pain & bone crushing fatigue. An intimate, enduring & ever-present relationship with God via Jesus Christ is The Love that is absolutely necessary for sustaining life (eternal life). I've had to learn this the hard way. I pray that in sharing my story, others won't have to learn the hard way. For those already in 'a hard way', I pray that this will be a reminder to: 'ask for the ancient paths, ask where the good way is & walk in it', amen! Over & over through out scripture, God teaches us, especially in times of troubles, to listen for His instruction & obey as an act of faith. This likely means we must first clear away distractions & let God write our to-do list. Jesus offered up a small amount of food & praised God for multiplying it to feed thousands (in Matthew, Mark, Luke & John). Lord, I lift up the food You graciously provide to me. I praise Your blessing of it satisfies all who are hungry, thank You our Great Giving Father! How did the woman who had bled for twelve years, suffering under the care of many doctors (& spending all she had), how did she come to know: 'If only I may touch His clothes, I shall be made well." (Mark 5:28)? According to Jewish Law, anything or anyone she touched became unclean, but because Jesus came to fulfill the law, he cleansed her. Jesus gave her the instruction she needed to heal. He knew she would touch Him before it happened. After Peter ASKED Him to, Jesus told Peter to "Come" walk on the stormy sea to Him (Matthew 14:25-33). Obviously, it was not that walking was difficult for Peter. The tricky part was believing he could walk on a non-solid substance in the midst of a storm! This story tells me that when the Lord says "Come" I might be called to do an something I already know how to do within a context that seems impossible. This type of act of faith, I have been practicing when my energy is extremely low or scattered or when a feeling of overwhelm tries to take over. Rather than elaborate plans, God knows these acts of faith often need to be very simple, such as raising my arms up & reciting a health confession: "This is my comfort in my affliction, that Thy word has revived me" (Psalm 119:50). When Jesus healed people, He often gave them a simple instruction: "Bring the boy here to me." (Matthew 17:17) When praying for healing, I encourage myself & those I am praying for to listen for an instruction from the Lord. It may be a very simply action (yet still often requires great faith, like "walking on water"). The receiving of an instruction is not about testing the Lord or "testing out" His healing. By listening, we are practicing & honing our ability to hear God! & act-ivating our faith, healing & discipleship, amen!
This seven minute animation (Retelling the Good Story) is where I got the two art images above. This video is a beautiful artistic version of two Gospel stories told from a First Nations cultural perspective. I hope you enjoy it as much as I do :) youtu.be/QMPlZLGWT80?si=2xnERxelb8aOTpuz God loves everyone unconditionally, meaning no matter what we do, He loves us, wanting the best for us. He knows what the best for each of us is, since we are His creation & children. He is patient, wanting everyone to come to Him for repentance. More about Jesus’ forgiveness here: because-he-first-loved-us.html
Many times in the Bible, we are told "Do not fear" also 1 John 4:18 says "Perfect love casts out fear". Yet, it is also written: "The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom..." (Proverbs 9:10) which seems a contradiction but it's not. When we have rightful fear of the Lord, we need not live in fear of the evil in the world. The Lord goes about His way of inspiring each of us toward His forgiveness & will. Allowing the "heat" of this world to intensify our life experience until (ideally) we drop to our knees in surrendered reverence to Him. This type of genuflect happens often from fear (illness, pain, conviction of sin) & awe as God's love provides profound moments of relief. The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom; it's not our only/final destination! It makes sense to fear the One who is "all love" & therefore, all powerful. He protects us from that which is "all evil". While evil is a much limited force compared to love, it's damaging. Whereas agape, like parental love, doesn't always feel good, but it is good for us: "I am the Lord, & there is no other .... Causing well-being & creating calamity..." (Isa. 45:5 & 7). Most everyone longs for love, yet we also fear it to some degree because it means obliteration of little 's' self (our version of death on the cross). There is no hiding anything from the crucible of God's love. His love reveals, in ways that lead us to repent, our self-defeating/inflating & vengeful behaviors as well as our prideful, selfish, jealous & otherwise sinful natures. It's not easy; it's the warriors' way of the cross, fitting through the narrow gate unto resurrection. A YouTube short I made on this topic: https://youtube.com/shorts/bFYSrCpl9bQ?si=QLq4A1JG8-zfOH6i A clip from a Youtube video about masculinity & the Way of the Cross: https://youtube.com/clip/UgkxcRsAjUt9KRQlJy5wRk0KwvauABJRncyM?si=gv9Og410XrNPQNbg Thank You Father for giving us Your word. May everyone hear the word of the Lord & give ear to the instruction of our God (1:10). Guide each of us to cease evil, learn to do good & seek justice (1:16-17). Thank You for taking our sins as scarlet & making them as white as snow (1:18). Urge us Lord, our rulers & companions also, to be righteous in Your eyes (1:23 & 26). To all who forsake the Lord, I command their hearts & minds open to You, so that they shall not come to an end (1:28). Oh God, without You as our living water, even a strong man will become tinder, his work also a spark (1:31).
Thank You God for teaching us concerning Your ways so that we may walk in Your paths (2:3). Nation no longer lifts up sword against nation. Never again do we learn war! Praise God, we walk in the light of the Lord (2:4-5). Our pride & loftiness is humbled, You are exalted & idols completely vanish (2:17-18), praise the Lord! In You, we do not oppress each other but we uplift & lovingly guide each other to You (3:5) through speech & actions that are for & not against You (3:8). Thank You dear God for providing shade from the heat & a refuge from storms (4:6). Give us strength & courage to stop with truth, those who drag iniquity with the cords of falsehood & sin as if with cart ropes (5:18). Thank You God for straightening out any confusion among us about what is evil & what is good (5:20). Keep us relying on You instead of being wise in our own eyes & clever in our own sight (5:21). Thank You for bringing us to work together to establish Your peace & light in the darkness & distress of this land (5:30). Lord, we see You with our eyes, hear You with our ears, understand You with our hearts & return to You, the lost & sick & we are healed (6:10). In Your word, You tell us: "Take care, be calm, have no fear & do not be fainthearted ..."(7:4). Almighty Father, You gave us a sign! A virgin bore a son & she called His name Immanuel. Praise the Lord, He knows to refuse evil & choose good (7:14-15). Dear God, Thank You for being with us (8:10). You tell us that we are not to fear what the world fears or be in dread of it (8:12). You shall be our fear then You shall become a sanctuary (8:13-14). Commit Your work of good & truth among all mediums & spiritists to consult You rather than the dead on behalf of the living (8:19). Thank You Father for making all people who walk in darkness see a great light (9:2) & for breaking the yoke of their burden (9:4). I pray that the government rest's well on the shoulders of Your Son, our Lord Jesus, who was given to us. Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Eternal Father, Prince of Peace, praise the Lord that there is no end to the increase of Your government or of peace (9:6-7). In Jesus name, I cast away false teachings that try to lead us astray (9:16). Thank you for burning up & dissolving the wickedness within each of us. Consume with fire the briars & thorns that entangle, oppress & hurt us (9:18). Faithful Father, Your hand is still stretched out & we praise You (9:21)! Woe to those who deprive the needy of justice & rob the poor of their rights. Urge us to protect & care for the widows & orphans, Lord (10:2) like You do, as one gathers abandoned eggs, You gather all the earth, (10:14), glory be to God. Blessed is the day we all truly rely on the Lord (10:20) & delight in the fear of the Lord (11:3). Praise You Father, deciding with fairness for the afflicted of the earth & with the breath of Your lips, slaying the wicked (11:4). We will not hurt or destroy in all Your holy mountain as the earth is filled up with the knowledge of the Lord (11:9). I give thanks to Thee, O Lord; Thine anger is turned away & Thou comforts me (12:1). You are my salvation; I trust & am not afraid. For the Lord God is my strength & song (12:2). We learn from long ago, in the day of the Lord, when hands fell limp, hearts melted, pains & anguish took hold (13:6-8) & sinners were exterminated from the land (13:9). You punished the world for its evil, the wicked for their iniquity & put an end to the arrogance of the proud (13:11). Mortal man became scarcer than pure gold (13:12) in the day of Your burning anger (13:13). Blessed is the day Lord, when You give us rest from pain, turmoil & harsh service (14:3). The whole earth is at rest & is quiet, breaking forth into shouts of joy (14:7)! Those who are most helpless, eat & the needy lie down in security (14:30). The afflicted of Your people, find refuge (14:32). Amen! Thank You God for establishing Your throne of loving-kindness (16:5). I pray that all people have regard for You, their Maker (17:7). Because we know You are God of salvation & the rock of refuge (17:10), the harvest will not be a heap in a day of sickliness & incurable pain (17:11). Thanks be to God for sending a Savior & a Champion to deliver us (19:20). Striking Egypt but healing, they returned to You (19:22). Your power within me overcomes pain that attempts to seize me. Once so bewildered, I could not hear, so terrified I could not see; mind reeling, horror overwhelming (21:3-4) --No more; it is finished! I've turned up the volume of Your Holy Spirit in me & turn down the volume of my flesh. Pain is gone now in the name of Jesus. Chronic pain & illness have no place in my life. Yes, I want to be well Lord & I'm ready; thank You for healing me, amen! The earth, polluted by its inhabitants' transgressing laws, violating statutes & breaking everlasting covenants (24:5), has been washed in the curse-breaking blood of Jesus. He has redeemed us & now we work earnestly, cleaning up & stewarding God's creation righteously. Thank you God for swallowing up death for all time & wiping tears away from all faces (25:8). You are our God for whom we waited & now you've saved us. We rejoice & are glad in Your salvation (25:9)! The steadfast of mind, Thou keeps in perfect peace because he trusts in Thee (26:3). I trust in the Lord forever, for in God the Lord, we have an everlasting Rock (26:4). The way of the righteous is smooth (26:7). Indeed my spirit seeks Thee diligently (26:9). When earth experiences Thy judgements, inhabitants of the world learn righteousness, especially the wicked & everyone perceives the majesty of the Lord (26:9-10). When Your chastising is upon us & we seek Thee in distress, only whispering a prayer (26:16), please have mercy Lord, in just the right amount. For You know each of our hearts better than we know ourselves. Hear the word of the Lord, O scoffers (28:14). The multitude of the ruthless ones are like the chaff which blows away (29:5). Thank You God for laying in Zion a stone, a tested stone, a costly cornerstone for the foundation, firmly placed. He who believes in it will not be disturbed (28:16). Bless You for instructing & teaching us properly (28:26). Your counsel is wonderful & Your wisdom is great (28:29). Help us not get ourselves into trouble with You Lord pouring over us a spirit of deep sleep, shutting prophets eyes & covering the heads of seers (29:10). Walking in obedience of Your way, with Your healing power, the deaf hear words in a book & out of their darkness, the eyes of the blind, see (29:18). Praise the Lord! Today is the day that the afflicted increase their gladness in the Lord & the needy rejoice in the Holy One of Israel (29:19). All who are intent on doing evil are cut off (29:20), those who err in mind now know the truth & those who criticize, accept instruction (29:24). Woe to those who execute plans that are not Yours & make alliance not of Your Spirit, adding sin to sin (30:1). Bless God that it is so, in repentance & rest we are saved; in quietness & trust is Your strength (30:15). You long to be gracious to us. You wait on high to have compassion on us. For You are a God of justice. How blessed are all those who long for You (30:18). Although Lord, You gave us bread of privation & water of oppression, You, our Teacher no longer hide Yourself. Our eyes behold You, our Teacher & our ears hear a word behind us "This is the way, walk in it" whenever we turn to the right or to the left (30:20-21). We say to graven images "Be gone!" (30:22). Thank you God for binding up the fracture of Your people & healing the bruise You inflicted (30:26). You Lord cause the voice of Your authority to be heard, amen (30:30)! Your Spirit is poured out upon us from on high (32:15). The work of righteousness is peace & the service of righteousness, quietness & confidence forever (32:17). Blessed are we who sow beside all waters (32:20). God, You are the stability of our times, a wealth of salvation, wisdom & knowledge. The fear of the Lord is our treasure (33:6). Sinners are terrified, Lord. Trembling has seized the godless. "Who among us can live with the consuming fire? Who among us can live with continual burning?" (33:14). Let us take Your strength, courage & words leading them to Your salvation. Glory to God that all who walk righteously, speak with sincerity & reject unjust gain (33:15), dwell on the heights. Our refuge is the impregnable rock. Our bread is given & our water is sure (33:16). Lord, You are our judge, our lawgiver, our King & You save us (33:22)! No resident says "I am sick." The people who dwell here are forgiven their iniquity (33:24). We encourage the exhausted & strengthen the feeble (35:3). We say to those with anxious heart: "Take courage, fear not. Behold, God comes with vengeance & saves you." (35:4). The eyes of the blind are opened. The ears of the deaf are unstopped (35:5). The lame leap like a dear. The tongues of those who can not speak, shout for joy (35:6). Thirsty ground springs of water (35:7). This Highway of Holiness is for all who walk this way (35:8). The redeemed walk here (35:9). Gladness & joy are found & sorrow & sighing flee away (35:10). Thou art God of all kingdoms on earth. Thou has made heaven & earth (37:16). In Your name, we deliver ourselves & others from evil & all kingdoms of earth know that Thou alone, Lord, art God (37:20). You know our sitting down, our going out & our coming in (37:28). Because of our arrogance, You put Your hook in our noses & Your bridle in our lips (37:29). As Hezekiah prayed, I pray also: "Remember now, O Lord, I beseech Thee. I have walked before Thee in truth, with a whole heart & have done what is good in Thy sight." (38:3). You heard his prayer, saw his tears & behold, You added fifteen years to his life (38:5). Likewise, You heal my body of physical disease making me the long-living, healthy new creation You created me to be! When any of us moan like doves & feel oppressed, be our security (38:14). Restore us to health & let us live (38:16)! Thank You for keeping my soul from the pit of nothingness & casting all my sins behind Thy back (38:17). Thank You Father for these days of peace & truth (39:8). Amen! Other translations of Ecclesiastes 1:2 *Vanity of vanities, saith the Preacher. Vanity of vanities; all is vanity. (KJV & ASV) *"Everything is meaningless," says the Teacher, "completely meaningless!" (NLT) *Hevel, havalim, saith Kohelet, hevel havalim; all is hevel. (OJB) *"It is of no use," says the Preacher. "It is of no use! All is for nothing." (NLV) *"Futility of futilities," says the Preacher, futility of futilities! All is futility (NASB) *"Vanity of vanities," says the Preacher. "Vanity of vanities! All (that is done without God's guidance) is vanity (futile, meaningless--a wisp of smoke, a vapor that vanishes, merely chasing the wind)." (AMP) Similar to being mesmerized by a campfire, I love watching steam rise & swirl from a hot beverage. The random fluidity of vapor can be simultaneously mysterious, calmly frantic & delicately serene. A beautiful dance of nature--unrepeating, fleeting & wonderfully artistic. When I read the different translations of Ecclesiastes 1:2, I think of these enjoyable encounters I've had with "hevel" (steam). In saying "All is vanity" the Teacher/Preacher, at least in part, is describing the not so uncommon feeling of being 'stuck in a hamster wheel' ... but there is a bit more to it than that. The Amplified Bible translation (AMP), with its explanation in brackets, makes sense of this verse in light of the whole twelve chapters of Ecclesiastes. The Preacher says "And all that my eyes desired I did not refuse them. I did not withhold my heart from any pleasure, for my heart was pleased because of all my labor and this was my reward for all my labor ... and behold all was vanity and striving after wind and there was no profit under the sun." (2:10-11) It makes sense to listen to this wisdom learned because even after literally having everything one's heart could possibly desire and more, the Preacher proclaims the pointlessness of all of it "under the sun" but what about "in the Son" (as in, in God's way): "For who can eat and who can have enjoyment without Him?" (2:25) A common question, is the Preacher depressed or just pessimistic? He shares that even wisdom is futile, "...in much wisdom there is much grief, and increasing knowledge results in increasing pain." (1:18) It is God's help through grief & pain that brings the Preacher the Truth of God. Although this does not relieve his own suffering, the Truth continues to come through, from him, to help others, as God allows. Seeing 'the glass as half empty OR half full' is not nearly as important as honoring the One who provides the glass & drinking the living water within it that eternally quenches our thirst. So first and foremost, meaning & enjoyment (yes, it's fun!) come through a Godly life: "The conclusion, when all has been heard, is: fear God and keep His commandments, because this applies to every person. For God will bring every act to judgement, everything which is hidden, whether it is good or evil." (12:13-14) "A generation goes and a generation comes ..." (1:4); the fleeting nature of life, like steam, reminds us to put our faith not in people or things but in the Lord, for "The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not want" (KJV) & "The Lord is my shepherd, I lack nothing" (NIV). We are to want, not what we want, but what God wants. When we take this Godly perspective, we live in appreciation of all the beautiful things God provides, such as enjoying the breeze (rather than chasing the wind, lol) & we ask Lord, "Please remove or fulfill my unmet needs & desires in ways that are glorifying to You, amen!" This is not repression, rather it frees & makes us lighter. I pray God that we do not get caught up in self importance & the pursuit of happiness. I pray for all who are ensnared in the traps of this world; the never ending striving for success on our own terms. Help us put You first & not just give you the time we have leftover after everything else gets done or to turn to You only when we're in dire straits. The Preacher cautions us to: "Remember Him before the silver cord is broken and the golden bowl is crushed, the pitcher by the well is shattered and the wheel at the cistern is crushed;" (12:6) Just as a ship needs an anchor onboard before leaving the dock, we are to know & honor "God, the Eternal" before befalling into the pit of despair and before crawling desperately dehydrated upon a well to find only a shattered pitcher there. For a moment of separation from God is (like) an eternity in hell that only ONE lived through & triumphs over. Holy, Holy, Holy, the Lord God Almighty, In Jesus name, amen! |
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